09 May The Other Side of my Story
Life began by waking up and loving my mother’s face. – George Eliot
The more I have been asked to share my story, the more my story has revealed itself. Over the years, layer by layer I have gone back to remember what events have shaped me, the messages I have heard over the years and what people have had the most influence over my life.
I have told the detailed accounts of some of the things that have made me what I am today. Mostly about the things I have come up against in my life; people that insisted on telling me being “an artist” wasn’t enough or how the art I made didn’t fit in (it wasn’t bold enough, loud enough, political enough, edgy enough). These voices are the ones that I had to fight against for much of my early life are the ones that have remembered most. Maybe because they hurt the most and pain has a way of etching itself into our memory.
I have shared how I had struggled to drown out those voices so I could keep following my own inner-knowing; that living a creative life was going to be enough if I could just keep believing it and that my art was an important part of me and that what I had to say, create, make, share mattered and that the rest would fall into place.
But, even that’s not the whole story.
There’s a piece of this puzzle I have not acknowledged, until recently. It’s that my “inner-knowing” was cultivated from some of my earliest memories. From the very beginning of my life, I had heard a different voice;
The one that told me that I could do anything.
It was this kind, loving, supportive, unconditional voice that had been speaking to me for as long as I can remember and it’s the same one that kept telling me exactly what I needed to hear to keep me walking my path regardless the obstacles, no matter what they were.
This is the part of my story that perhaps is the most important of all. The part I had forgotten. The part I now so vividly remember. The part that has made me who I am. That part that began with the voice of my mother.
Happy Mother’s Day Mom. I love you so.